I write my own quotes. Except this one. I obviously stole this from somebody really clever.
I wonder: when a Jehovah's Witness dies and goes to Heaven, does God hide behind the door and pretend He's not home?
I watch what I eat every day. I mean, who actually eats with their eyes closed?
True friends: only a few have 'em, but only a few will admit that they don't.
Dear disgruntled artists: the key to success isn't kicking down the door; it's building your own.
As much as it hurts, I would rather miss someone than hit someone.
Individuality or Unity? I say there's room for both.
Don't hate me 'cause I'm booed a fool!
Just because you're scarred for life doesn't mean you should be scared to live.
Chuck Norris doesn't need to understand the work of James Joyce; James Joyce needs to understand the work of Chuck Norris.
Don't hate the word, playa; hate the dictionary.
Maybe the best way to get people to be pro-life is to start 'em off in amateur-life.
Some people put up a peace sign with one hand. Some people put up the middle finger instead. I use two hands and put up both.
The only way to get under me is to get over yourself.
Get tough: don't work under pressure; work over pressure.
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