If we are now holding late-night talk-show hosts to the same moral accountability as we hold politicians or clergymen, I'm out. I'm gone.
I think comedy comes more from a low sense of self-esteem, and I certainly have that.
Is it really that important? It's just television, for God's sake. It's not medicine or something.
I think sometimes that people think brave means not being afraid, which of course it doesn't mean that at all. It means that you're afraid, but you move past that and do it anyway, do what you think is right.
I got sober. I stopped killing myself with alcohol. I began to think: 'Wait a minute - if I can stop doing this, what are the possibilities?' And slowly it dawned on me that it was maybe worth the risk.
Other than the laws of physics, rules have never really worked out for me.
It's very interesting to know what people are doing while you're working on late-night television.
I'm not aware of having a creepy laugh, but apparently I do.
I don't know now if I'm funny. I just keep talking and hope that I hit something that's funny.
I'm a terrible interviewer. I'm not a journalist - although I have a Peabody Award - and I'm not really a late-night host. What I am is honest.
I came to America, and I made good. It's an old story, but it hasn't been told in a long time. Usually, it's, 'I'm an immigrant, I came here and got persecuted.' My story is I came here, I worked hard, and it worked out all right. So it's still available.
I used to believe, like many people who come from poor backgrounds, that it gave me an edge, but I think that's just something we have to tell ourselves to get by sometimes. I don't believe that anymore. Children of privilege can be just as talented and clever as anybody else.
Don't ever rope me in as a late-night talk show host. I don't want to be one.
I don't see my show as a stepping stone to something else like some people, who get a job then have a foot out the door looking for their next job.
I dropped out of high school when I was 16, after I had a huge argument with my English teacher over the meaning of the word 'existentialism.'
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