It's better to waste money, than it is to waste time. You can always get more money.
Political and social change is always a stagger-step process. One step forward, two steps back. They want you to give up.
People think that the arts are optional and they aren't. They teach a level of emotional depth that's equally important to mathematic skill. You can replace some math skills with a calculator if you know how to operate the thing, but there's no calculator for human interaction.
If you are for freedom and equal rights, which we hear a lot of talk about these days, then you have to include the LGBTQ community in that. And if you're not willing to put your time where your mouth is, then I don't know quite what you mean by commitment in your life.
If you take anything I say with any seriousness whatsoever, go study Yang style tai chi. It will make you live longer.
Jerry Springer' is just kind of the chubby, redneck version of throwing Christians to the lions.
Sometimes I play guitar like a frustrated drummer.
I'm a futurist. Technology is our way out of almost every problem we have. Technology can create a new sense of community.
If I could sew comedy and philosophy together, then I've done a good job. The primary goal is always going to be laughs and the secondary goal is always going to be saying something without it being a lecture.
The pop musicians often leave meaning in the dust and substitute it for cartoons. The deeper artists - the grunge artists in the world and the emoticon people - tend to leave all of the happiness out of life like it just doesn't exist.
As a stand up, and often in acting, there is no place for the most intense feelings. Rage, genuine sorrow, naked hope... These things don't fit on a comedy stage and if you act you'll get to express them once in a while. Music is a place for the intensely personal.
Vegas has the Whitman's Sampler of audiences. They come from all different places, so you have to do some crowd psychology. You have to find the heartbeat of the room. It doesn't shift my jokes, but it shifts my timing and my attention.
If 'Airplane!' comes on, it's like a comfort film. You can always guarantee a laugh watching that movie.
I try to be as ignorant about things as I can.
Anyone who still supports George Bush would still let Michael Jackson babysit their kids.
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