Why not hold on to whatever I've got because it's as good as it's ever going to get. How can I believe that love is coming, how can I even believe that love exists; if I don't believe it's spiritually based?
I couldn't have come up with a better metaphor for my life and my internal conflict. It amazes me how quickly we can manifest our fears; not only had I created my 'I'm never satisfied, I'll drive her away' nightmare.
Running away will never make you free.
I had to get in touch with the source, I had to go back into my abandonment issues with my mother, I had to go into issues with my father I hadn't even looked at before.